Spitter's Sure Keep Me Busy...

Y'all are probably tired of hearing about my spitter's and the ups and downs of having spitter's as pets.  I feel for you and don't blame you one bit if you just quit reading this post 'cuz it's about spitter's.  The good.  The bad. The ugly, what used to be pretty, spitter's.

The good:  This has to do with Frick and Frack.  Do you remember them?  They are the latest addition in the spitter arena... not counting makeovers and head reattachments.  That would be them just to the right of these words. 

I was standing by the dining table looking at the pond... maybe just daydreaming... and got to thinking about Frick and Frack.  I was asking myself when the water suppy to these guys would deice enough for the water to start flowing.  So I moved over to where I could see them and would you believe I see water squirting in the air?  Here's a hearty WELCOME BACK to Frick and Frack.

The bad:  Well, there really isn't anything bad.  I just put that in the first paragraph because it felt necessary when talking about The Good and The Ugly.  Just how I am... just how I am.

The Ugly:  This is really bad... er, I mean ugly.  It's about Alejandro our gay spitter.  Remember the makeover s/he got back in December?  No?  Look here.  I thought she was beautiful... once the makeover was complete.  Well not so fast there four eyes... it would appear Alejandro has developed some kind of dandruff or peeling disease. 

As you can see, the dandruff or peeling disease is upon us and it seems to have progressed to a point where treatment such as touch-up or similar band-aids are beyond consideration.  About the only thing that is still looking good are the eye lashes... I really like them.

It's very sad to see her looking so -- well, so used -- so abused.  She reminds me of an old hooker down on B Street that hasn't figured out that time has passed her by.  Of course Alejandro is functional and will fill the pond as required once the freezing weather is over and I turn on the sprinklers.  But she is ugggggly.

I had purchased the finest quality outdoor latex paint that money could buy.  I'll be I spent $5.00 or maybe even $6.00 on this paint job and just look at it.  I'm thinking that I'll have to blast all the newly added paint and start anew.  So we will have to have a re-makeover... I guess we've all been there at one time or another.

Maybe this next time I should start with a sealer?  An oil based sealer maybe?  Would that give the exterior paint a better grip so it won't peel?  Maybe I need to seal the outside with some kind of clear coat?  I have to confess I just don't know what I need to do to make the paint job last.  BUT... I'm open to suggestions.  So if you know about this stuff or know someone who knows about this stuff I sure would appreciate a "heads up" on the painting process for yard art... er, I mean spitter makeover applications.

Stay tuned y'all.

whoohoo

Hector Update #3 ~ The Cure

After receiving the "second opinion" noted in the previous post we thought long and hard about what our next step should be in this arduous decision.  We narrowed our options to these:

1. Pound him to dust and spread his "ashes" along the path.
2. Just toss him into the trash can.
3. Attempt an epoxy repair, despite expert recommendations... what's to lose?

We selected option 3 with option 1 as plan "B."

I decided to use a paste epoxy with a 24 hour cure time.  I had some 5 minute curing epoxy but thought I wasn't fast enough with that to have it turn out OK.  Maybe afraid of the pressure of time constraints.  The paste epoxy is easy to use.  It comes in 2 small containers; 1 being black and the other being gray.  You mix it in a 1:1 ratio. 

I kept saying to myself, relax, it's just the opposite of a headectomy... no reason to stress.  Breath in... breath out.  In through the nose and out through the mouth.  Then I closed my eyes and began my Mantra.... Uummmmmmm, Uummmmmmm, Uummmmmm while trying to breath properly.  After about 30 seconds of this I opened my eyes and laughed my ass off... what a silly thing to do before playing with epoxy.

I mixed the epoxy, spread it as even as I could over where Hectors head used to be attached to his body, and then slapped on the top of his head... like an anti-Queen of Hearts in Alice in Wonderland... "On with his head!!!" The Mad Hatter is relieved to hear.  Anyway.....

I placed Hectors skull cap on the curing epoxy and squeezed it into place.  The epoxy oozed out the sides some.  His skull cap didn't fit as smoothly as one might wish as the thickness of the epoxy would not allow the skull cap all the way down to it's original position. I felt it necessary to smear the epoxy over the seams in an effort to seal the wound from future water penetration... if he lives that long.

I then set him aside to dry and become cured.

Three days later I placed him aside the pond and hooked him to the water supply.  He spit.

 

He Spits!

I considered painting him so he didn't look like Al Jolson getting ready to sing "Mammy."  I decided not to do that as the "battle scars" appeal to me.  How many folks can say they undid what the Queen of Hearts wanted done?  None that I know of... How many folks have any idea what I'm talking about... probably not to many (but if you do I like you... your my kinda folk)!

Second Opinion Re: Hector

This is the email response I got from Hector's creators.  I guess it is good that it was quick and painless... for Hector that is...

I attached the same photos that are in my blog post (below) of February 14.

Jim,
I think that it is time to say goodbye to Hector. We no longer manufacture that piece and he looks broken beyond an epoxy repair. You have our condolences.
-Henri Customer Service


On Mon, Feb 14, 2011 at 12:09 PM, Jim Watson wrote:
From: Jim Watson
Sent: Monday, February 14, 2011 10:12 AM

To: feedback@henristudio.com

Subject: Broken Spitter
 The photos are of my spitter, Hector. Hector, as you can see in the pictures, has lost his head. I’m not sure Hector is one of your products so I took a picture of the inscription.

I’m writing for advise on how to get hector (like Humpty Dumpty) put back together again. I was thinking I would use epoxy and then paint him but also consider that repairs may not last and I might as well bury my dead spitter.

I would appreciate your opinion.

Regards,


Now I'll have to figure out if we will have a wake.  Maybe a funeral.  Or just cremate him (would need to use a sledge hammer I think to make dust).  I could put him in a gourd and blow him up I suppose.  Anyone with any ideas?
 
Boohoo

Hector Lost His Head

Like the little egg head named Humpty Dumpty, Hector also is in need of being put back together.  I'm thinking it will take more than all the Kings horses and all the Kings men to put Hector back together again.  Hector's place in the pond was very close to Humpty Dumpty Falls... maybe some of the bad karma was radiating over to Hector.

On the other hand, some might assume he lost his head due to a bad temper and others jump to conclusions that it's drugs and yet others might just think it's immaturity.  Me... I think it's ice.  No, no not meth, not Immigration and Customs Enforcement (do you need a green card for a Spanish Spitter?), not diamonds.  I'm talking about water in the frozen state... uno, ice.

Take a look at this picture and you will get an idea about what I'm talking about.

My theory or educated guess based on the preliminary autopsy is water got trapped in the major hose artery, that clear thing right down the middle of the bottom picture, and froze.  As ice freezes it expands and easily can crack spitters right down their hose artery.  The second possibilty is the water seeped into a crack and over time enlarged the crack and through numerous freeze thaw cycles finally popped his head off.

I'm ready to move forward with the delicate "head early reattachment procedure," HELP," which will require copious amounts of epoxy and a delicate hand.  I have the epoxy. 

I've also written to the manufacturer/importer with a plea for help and/or advise on the HEL-Procedure.  I suspect their suggestion will be to put Hector out of his misery but how much misery can a spitter be in with his head detached from his body. 

This whole thing just cracks me up... Hector too I guess.

Stay tuned and I'll advise what happened when I administer HELP.

Whoohoo

Pumps Must Hate Winter

I suppose a rational person would just shut down the pond during the winter versus go through all the trials and tribulations necessary to keep things working in sub-zero temperatures.  I suppose I just defined myself as irrational as I keep plugging away each winter to keep things working.

I have my giant iron persuader to discourage ice but the pond will still freeze over and the waterfalls will become ice dams.  The water level will drop as the ice builds.  The pump will suck air thus risking burn out.  Less water flow means more ice buildup.  I will have frozen extremities from doing battle with the ice.  I have backup garden hoses in case I don't drain a hose properly during the cold mornings.  So far I've been able to rationalize my way past these obstacles.

On Saturday I hit a new challenge that just about put me over the edge.  It's the pump... one winter in a row I had no problems with the pump and now I'm back at it again. 

The pump must have joined some organized work slowdown as less and less water was coming over the falls.  I noticed this earlier in the week and tried just unplugging the pump, let it back wash a little and then replug it and found the flow returned fairly well... maybe 70 to 80 percent.  After a day or two the slowdown would return.  I dreaded removing the pump as that requires someone, me, to actually stick both hands in the water and try and loosen the coupling that connects the pump to the pipes. 

Saturday the weather warmed to above freezing for the first time in quite a while.  I decided I should go for it with the sun out versus having a complete shutdown during a storm (remember the quote from Murphy Jr.,  "My father was an optimist!"). 

I wanted to try and drain the skimmer by covering the hole in front with a shower curtain.  I messed with it and actually got the water to go down past the coupling.  The problem was it leaked.  I would unplug the pump and try to turn the coupling nut but it was not cooperating and the water quickly refilled the skimmer.  I messed with it for a while and finally got the nut loose... the coupling nut that is... and reached down into the icy water and removed the pump.

To my chagrin I found nothing obstructing the pump and the skimmer quickly filled to the top with water.

I took a deep breath as I plunged my hand and arm as well as the pump into the water, setting the pump on the bottom of the skimmer.  Then I needed to reconnect the coupling nut.  Damn that water is cold.  My hands didn't want to hold onto the nut.  My hands didn't want to work at all.  I decided to try and just align the pipes and then turn on the pump with the hope that enough water would be forced up the pipe to get the water level low enough to secure the coupling without my hands having to be in the water.

That was a mistake.  If, in the future, I ever try this again I will stand back as a pump that outputs around 7000 gallons per hour will put up quite a spray of water... cold, icy water... to the tune of 4 or 5 feet through any crack (or unsecured coupling). 

Once dried off and after taking a "get warm" break I just plunged my hands into the icy depths, with resolve, and after a couple of tries was able to get the coupling nut tight.  I then turned on the pump and magically it was working at 100%. 

I can't explain what the problem was but surmise it could have been something in the pipe that was jiggled loose by the on/off action with the pump or possibly there is something laying in the bottom of the skimmer just waiting to replug the intake on the pump.

A couple of hours later I was talking with my son and telling him about the trials and tribulations of pond maintenance and he asked me why I didn't just use a syphon to keep the water in the skimmer at bay.  Hmmmm... good question.  Maybe my brain was as frozen as my hands.

Whoohoo!